Seizures and love

/ Epilepsy Episode 3

„I am a sponge “, you said.

,,I suck in all the feelings of the people around me. Until I am overwhelmed with feelings, that are not even mine.”

Maybe the reason you feel empty watching me

drifting away like Alice into wonderland,

is because I am empty, too.

In those moments my soul is leaving my body.

The corpse you are looking at, cramping, drooling, transforming…

…that corpse,

is empty.

How can I ask you to feel love for that body, without the presence of its soul?

I don’t.

But all I want to ask you for,

is to hold my hand. A gentle touch, that I can remember whilst forgetting everything else.

To be there,

When my soul comes back.

Slowly entering the room,

My body,

And then yours.

2022

Jana Siân Blume